I was sitting here today feeling frumpy and dumpy. I hate my hair, I hate that I’m over-weight and I hate that my teeth aren’t whiter and that I have a crooked nose. The list could go on and on. Then I caught myself. I thought, why am I doing this to myself? Why am I putting myself down? Is it because of the media? The beautiful air-brushed women in magazines dressed in clothes that cost more than my car? In Jewelry that cost more than my house? Is it because of television commercials that show gorgeous women with not a flaw in sight? Is it peer pressure?
I find myself doing this more and more. I don’t want to go out because I don’t have the perfect outfit or look fat in the ones I have. Why are women so hard on themselves? Why do we beat ourselves up over things we can’t change? Why don’t we change the things we can and be satisfied with that?
All women feel at one time or another that they don’t live up to their own expectations or don’t live up to other’s expectations of them. They feel they are never doing enough for their families, their friends or work. They feel pulled in so many directions, always having to wear so many different hats. Just trying to keep everything balanced in their lives, keeping up with different activities and responsibilities is like a crazy juggling act.
For me, today I am going to start being a little nicer to myself. I’m going to embrace who I am and change the things I can. The things I can’t change I’m going to learn to accept them, the good, the bad and the ugly. I’m going to love myself just the way I am.
Do you struggle with self-acceptance? Do you beat yourself up over things you can’t change? Do you have a hard time looking in the mirror and loving what you see?
I want to challenge you today, to stop putting yourself down. To stop hating on yourself. I want to encourage you to love yourself just the way you are. To embrace who you are and put a stop to that negative talk in your head. I’m guilty of this myself, but no longer. I only have one life to live and I’m going to live it with Love!
Today will you commit to loving yourself just the way you are?
I would love for you to share your own personal struggles or hear any advice you may have if you’ve ever struggled in this area.
Inspirational Quotes to Inspire and Encourage You!
“Our words set the direction for our lives.”~Joel Osteen
“Change the way you speak about yourself and you can change your life.”~Joel Osteen
“What you think about yourself is much more important than what others think of you.”
- Marcus Annaeus Seneca
“I am somebody. I am me. I like being me. And I need nobody to make me somebody.”
- Louis L Amour
“To accept ourselves as we are means to value our imperfections as much as our perfections.”
- Sandra Bierig
“Why compare yourself with others? No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you.”
- Author unknown
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
23 comments
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Lauren Ivy Chiong
August 7, 2012 at 12:09 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Kim, this post is sweet and thoughtful, a real reflection of who you are. Like the song says, learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all. Love comes from within, and we have to be able to love ourselves to love others. This is really inspirational.
Lauren Ivy Chiong recently posted..Reel Mama’s 5 things you would learn about me if you walked through my house
Mandy
August 4, 2012 at 11:52 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
I do have those kind of days, but then I stop and think of how blessed I am. I’m alive, I’m healthy, I have an amazing family, friends, job, etc.
Mandy recently posted..Adaptu Financial shape Up & $50 Giveaway
Kim
August 5, 2012 at 1:12 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Yes, remembering that we are blessed to be alive and have our families and friends really helps to take our minds off the negative thoughts we might be having. Thanks Mandy for stopping by.
Kim recently posted..Look What I Got!
Karen
August 4, 2012 at 1:53 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Oh, girl! I know exactly what you mean. I used to feel like I wasn’t good enough, couldn’t do anything right, was never living up to expectations. Then I did what I consider to be the best money I ever spent on myself. I went into therapy, and went for a year and a half. That experience, when I was in my mid-thirties, helped me see that I WAS good enough, and that if people didn’t think I lived up to their expectations, then they needed to change their expectations. I also learned that it was OK to say no, to my mother, to my father, to so called friends who wanted my time but never gave me theirs. Just being able to say NO made my life so much easier.
After my time with my therapist, I have been happier, because I am able to make decisions based on what “I” want, and not on what OTHERS want from me. And, because of my more recent experience of being hospitalized for 34 days and nearly dying, well, I am so much happier with the body that I have, because I still have it. It ain’t perfect by any means, but thank GOD I am still alive to be happy another day.
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Kim
August 4, 2012 at 4:03 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Thanks for sharing that Karen. I too have been in therapy and have the best therapist in the world. She has helped me through so many ups and downs in my life. I am learning self-acceptance and to love myself just the way I am. I still struggle occasionally, but then give myself a good kick in the butt and pull myself out of it.
You make such a good point, about others expectations and learning to say NO!
I imagine facing a life and death situation as you have would really opens up one’s eyes to what really matters in life. It really puts things into perspective.
Thanks so much for the encouragement and sharing.
Kim recently posted..Look What I Got!
Beeb Ashcroft
August 4, 2012 at 11:39 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Great post and reminder! I can be hard on myself too.
Beeb Ashcroft recently posted..Sweepstakes Saturday
Kim
August 4, 2012 at 3:48 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Hi Beeb I so can relate to that. This is has always been a struggle for me, but as I’ve gotten older I’m really learning that all that matters is that I do my best and that’s good enough. The size I am, or if my hair is styled just so, or what I’m wearing, doesn’t matter at all. If I want to change something I will and if I don’t I wont. What someone else thinks of me, doesn’t matter anymore. Self-acceptance is key to living a happy and fulfilling life.
Thanks for stopping by.
Kim recently posted..Look What I Got!
Billie
August 2, 2012 at 10:55 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Those are fantastic quotes, Kim. I need to apply them. I’m hard on myself, I’ve always have been. I accept your challenge to try to be nicer to myself. Everyone else has great advice too.
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Kim
August 2, 2012 at 11:23 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
I love those quotes too. I’ve always been hard on myself too. Way to hard, but not anymore. I made a new commitment to love myself just the way I am and if other people don’t like me the way I am, then to bad. I too am taking everyone’s advice.
Kathy
August 2, 2012 at 10:47 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
I have gotten a lot better with this over the past few years. I have always been really good knowing when to stop beating up on myself.
Kathy recently posted..Getting Our Groove On With the Kolcraft Contours Optima Tandem Stroller
Kim
August 2, 2012 at 10:52 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Me too most days, but there are still times I struggle. Thanks Kathy for stopping by.
trisha
August 2, 2012 at 8:41 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
I just DONT struggle w/ this…i dont rely on others and i always think if i cant be strong enough for ME then why would i expect anyone else, you know? I think i do really good just being who I am.
trisha
trisha recently posted..Make Something Astrobright: How to make a paper flower
Kim
August 2, 2012 at 10:50 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
I wish I didn’t. Maybe it comes from growing up in a perfectionist environment, always feeling I was never good enough. I really don’t know, but I’m so glad you don’t have this struggle. I look up to people who are confident in their own skin and honestly, most of the time I am. But there are times, you know, when I just have a really bad day.
Andrew Kardon
August 2, 2012 at 8:29 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Great post, Kim. Women certainly seem to go through this more than men (most men have pretty much no shame, right?). You can certainly blame the media a bit, as well as Photoshop! But when you’re feeling like that, take a moment to reflect. There is ALWAYS someone who has it way worse than you. Imagine if you were born in a third-world country with barely enough food to keep you alive. Would you care at all that your dress makes you look fat? Try to put a huge global spin on things to get some perspective.
It’s easy to look in the mirror and not feel beautiful. But honestly (and this becomes more apparent the older we get), beauty really is within. Personality, attitude and actions are what make someone truly beautiful. So stop worrying about your hair, or your makeup or your weight. Life is way too incredibly short to waste it playing what if.
Andrew Kardon recently posted..Thrill Your Socks Off on a UK Theme Park Holiday
Kim
August 2, 2012 at 12:16 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Thanks Andrew. It’s nice to hear from a man’s perspective. I appreciate your encouragement. Great tips to remember the next time I find myself in a slump.
TerriAnn @ Cookies & Clogs
August 2, 2012 at 12:22 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Thank you so much for this. I’ve been at a horrible low in terms of self-esteem lately for pretty much the same reasons you listed above. I went to get my hair cut to feel a bit nicer but the lady chopped off all my hair and I look like a boy. I pretty much broke down when I got back to my car. I think it makes a world of difference to have people that love and care about you surrounding you. I’m going to take your advice and try to think of something I like about myself. Thanks *HUGS*
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Kim
August 2, 2012 at 1:40 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Hi TerriAnn. So sorry about your hair. I once had the same thing happen to me. What’s up with hairdressers lately? I completely understand. I know we always hear that looks aren’t that important, but in our society I’m afraid it is, but I’m working on having a more positive attitude. I know it’s what’s on the inside that matters most. Whether or not I’m a good person and the example I am setting for my kids. The things on the outside are only temporary. We can never keep our youth, we all grow old eventually and the legacy I want to leave behind is more than just how I look. It’s nice to know I’m not all alone in my struggles.
Heather
August 1, 2012 at 11:40 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
I look at it this way – life is short. We need to enjoy it. Sitting around worrying about superficial things is not going to give us a good life. Don’t sweat the small stuff. As long as I’m on this side of the earth and I have my family then things are awesome and I can do anything I want to do. Live and be happy!
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Kim
August 2, 2012 at 1:34 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Thanks so much for the encouragement Heather. What a wonderful attitude to have. This is something I need to work on.
Maria
August 1, 2012 at 11:35 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Very inspiring quotes. I can relate to needing to hear them sometimes. It’s just a matter of keeping busy with the things I enjoy in life in order to not give myself a chance to get caught up in the “my teeth aren’t perfectly straight” and “my nose is too big”. No one is perfect and when I put these things into perspective I realize it’s silly to be hard on myself, and worse, it’s damaging on so many levels. Try to focus on the traits that you like about yourself when you need the confidence boost. And thanks for sharing with such honesty.
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Kim
August 1, 2012 at 11:42 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Thanks Maria. So true. I think we are harder on ourselves than we are on anyone else. I am working on trying to focus on the positive and not the negatives.
RJ
August 1, 2012 at 7:59 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Great post!! I love those quotes too.
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Kim
August 1, 2012 at 11:43 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment
Thanks R.J. for stopping by. I really thought those quotes were inspirational too. Glad you liked them.